Apartments

I have a pain in my chest, it could be heart burn.
I've been hearing a ringing in my ear all day. Its probably a brain tumor.
This computer sounds like crickets in a field.

FAMILY

You never cease to make me feel guilty.

SPOKANE

you never cease to make me feel like shit.

Vegan Lasagna

I've finally decided I'm going to try and settle down in slo for a bit.
Now that I've finally come to that I'm so fucking freaked out about it.
I already feel really unproductive and lazy, even though I wasn't doing anything before this. And what I consider is productive is just doing art and thinking and creating memories that are worth remembering. Then again, I tend to have the best thoughts and art and write decent songs when I'm going crazy in one place. Not that I'm torturing myself for good art.
Or am I?
Meh, fuck it.

Trying to get a job for a little while is going to be ridiculous though.
I give up just thinking about it.
ugh.

Shitty shit and the shit that shits it out.

Getting over shit is hard. Especially when shit is people. I don't know why its so hard for me to be mad at people I'm close to, even when they lie. Being mad is a part of getting over so I'm told. Along with thinking about it and letting it bother you because the only way to get past it is accept it. If I don't think about it its gonna be even worse when it finally comes up, but if I'm thinking about it all the time and have bad dreams about it all the time I'm gonna be bummed all the time and it sucks. Alot. all the time. Gah.. I feel so shitty and inadequate and stupid and foolish and I told myself that I wasn't gonna be an angsty moody teenage girl and write about it but whatever. Fuck it right?

Coming back to california................

Haven't wrote anything in a bit.
I feel like if I had it would have been some angsty moody teenage girl bullshit and I'm not down with that even though I might feel like it.

I met someone one my way back down who was so wonderful and crazy and everything about our interaction was so wonderful and crazy because we were both out of our minds from riding the greyhound for days with no sleep. I found out we were floating around for the same kind of reasons and that we both wanted to travel to the south so after knowing eachother for a few hours we decided we are going to meet up in a month and go there and have crazy adventure times. When he agreed to go he made me play a game with him where I thought of the greatest thing ever and he captured it with my eyes closed.

I'm so excited.

Scabies.

They are fucking killing me.
I coated my body in neuro-toxin cream, hopefully they should be gone now but until everyone gets treating in the house I'm staying at, there still out there, waiting to burrow in my flesh like the fucking parasite-pieces of shit they are.